Monday, September 27, 2010

Don't surprise me like that!!

Special K doesn't like surprises. For instance, if you approach her desk at a normal pace and politely ask, "Hi Special K, could I please get some postage for this letter?," she likes to jump mid-air and look at you as though you've pulled a gun on her. Fortunately, her aversion to shocks like this mean that she is hypersensitive to possible threats to our safety and sense of calm in the workplace.

We have a yearly fire alarm test that is carried out by our alarm company. Not a huge deal, but they do sound the alarms a few times to make sure everything is working. Now, in most places of employment I would imagine that employees are, indeed, warned. But perhaps not as well as we are:

To all Staff:

I was contacted by Bob Smith of SG Alarms on Wednesday (7/29/09) afternoon. He kindly alerted me that two gentlemen (Kevin and another person) will be testing our fire alarm system first thing Thursday morning, 7/30/09 (per our contract). I wanted to give everyone a “heads-up” – so that you will not be surprised when you see people walking around our building or hear odd noises on occasion for an hour or so. Please let me know if you have any concerns (L: I believe that I have previously mentioned this testing to you). Thank you for your attention and cooperation.

With best wishes,

Special K

However, this leaves so many questions unanswered. Who is this "another person"? What do Kevin and "another person" look like? How will I distinguish them from the 6 people who work in the office? Is a "heads-up" the same as a heads-up? What constitutes "odd"? Will these noises be frightening? She has my attention, but I am not certain my fear is assuaged.

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